ReadyMade: Instructions for everyday life

Swingers

by Steve Fox

Photos by Doves

When I explain that we host a yearly 150-person DIY mini golf tournament at our house, two questions get asked. First: “Do you play golf?” No way, I say. Mini golf isn’t golf. It’s the anti-golf, an excuse to socialize, wear clashing plaids and launch a small ball through tubes, windmills, papier mache behemoths, and the occasional high-concept video-based gauntlet. The second question: “Why?” Ten years after our first BYOH (Bring Your Own Hole), I still don’t have a good answer. I just know that every spring my wife and I get the urge to build large structures out of foam core, metal tubing, duct tape, and AstroTurf. What more reason do you need?

AXIS OF EVIL: Par 3

W’s swinging noggin’ makes a tricky obstacle as you putt into Dick C’s open mouth. Grease a few palms and presto: a hole in one. And who knows, maybe even a night in the Lincoln Bedroom. 
Hole design: Robert Kanes and Bud Peen

FOOT FETISH: Par 3

Even the most callused mini golfer can lose her sole trying to putt the expanse of this giant foam-core foot. Beware the dastardly toe jam trap, strategically placed just north of the cup.
Hole design: Gene Heller

Balls! Par 9

Jeremy sulks after hitting a double bogey on the Sweet Tooth course. Even the papier mache Life Savers couldn’t rescue him from the rough of a giant cavity-filled mouth.
Hole design: Steve Fox and Leslie Crawford

VINCENT VAN GOLF: Par 2

Poor Vincent. Good thing he never had to putt into his own ear. This papier mache self-portrait is a mini golf challenge that could make anyone go mad.
Hole design: Mimi Heft and Paul Mavrides

THE 19th HOLE

In the end, the Axis of Evil clobbered our boys. Time for a nap on the green before retiring to the clubhouse for a final round of G&T’s.